Here’s How to Be Proud of Your Singleness

Here’s the 3rd article in my love series, lasting only this week. Regular content will resume soon!

Singleness is a taboo topic among many groups. This is because it has many different reactions to it. Some are proud to be single, some are sad to be single, and those who are in relationships pretend to be more enlightened than single people. Singleness is a topic not many people know to navigate in a healthy way.

If I had to come up with a standard guess for how people felt about singleness, I would say many people see it as a sad thing. Most single people want to be in relationships, and most couples push relationships on people. It is the general consensus to “treat” singleness, as if it could somehow be cured.

Yet, I don’t see singleness as a sad thing.

A mistake we make in talking about singleness is that our culture can discuss the topic as if it means being alone. Singleness equals loneliness.

When you state singleness like this, it is a very sad concept. But I never viewed singleness as this during my bachelor years. In fact, I really enjoyed singleness. I was proud of it—not as a phony cover-up, but as a genuine feeling.

Here’s the secret to being proud of your singleness: don’t view it as being alone.

Singleness is the opportunity to fill your life with meaningful friendships.

This became evident to me from the life of Jesus. Jesus was an oddball compared to most Jewish men who were getting married in their twenties. Instead, Jesus was single in His thirties. He had to watch His friends marry others while He waited for the right time to unveil His mission.

It sounds tough, but Jesus never complained about this. He wasn’t starving for love, and He wasn’t alone either. He instead filled His life with deep friendships. 

I know many people who have chosen not to get married in their lifetime. I respect them because I know that’s not me. But one thing I learned from these friends is that a relationship isn’t for everyone. Our culture presses the satisfaction of being in a relationship on everyone, and yet, there are people who are fine without that type of love. Instead of asking who they are going to marry, they instead ask if they are going to marry. This is because they know they can do without that type of love.

So my advice to you is this: don’t assume that you are not meant to be single. Surround yourself with friends and then assess if a relationship is right for you.

While we can live a life with no relationships, we can’t live without friendships.

Jesus displays this in His life to show just how true this statement is. He gathered the disciples and others around Him, making His life ripe with healthy friendships.

We can do this for our singleness as well. We can overcome the stigma of loneliness. All we have to do is make the most of our singleness by building meaningful friendships.

Photography by Mikaela Hamilton

This article was an excerpt from my latest eBook called JesusHacks (Original, right??). Good news is, you can get a FREE copy of it from NoiseTrade today! Get your copy here.