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Your Relationships Need This to Survive

by Neal Samudre · Jan 22, 2015

Life is tragically overstuffed with to-do lists, goals, and schedules. In the midst of this chaotic rush, it can be difficult to build thriving friendships.

I’ve learned this the hard way. After leaving college, I experienced what many twentysomethings have felt at one time or another—loneliness. Once I couldn’t go down the hall to talk with my friends, once I had to pick up the phone and actually dial their number, our relationships became strained, and as a result, I felt lonely.

But the truth was, I always could pick up the phone. I could message them on Skype them or send them a text.

Yet in the rush of a busy life, I only favored the relationships that were convenient—the ones that were right in front of my face as I moved throughout the day. It was difficult to pick up the phone and call my friends because I was too engulfed in my own schedule to do so.

This is what happens to many of us. We keep friendships because they’re convenient. But what happens when they stop being convenient is they also stop being friendships.

We feel the lack of friendships once they stop being convenient.

And that’s why I felt lonely—because I was only used to friendships where I didn’t have to sacrifice. But now I know, this isn’t how to keep my friendships going.

Now, I know that whenever I have to tell readers to sacrifice, I have to balance it with some inspiring statement, so here it is:

If you risk with your friendships, you’ll keep them. And in the end, keeping friendships is much better than having a stockpile of artificial relationships. It’s a rule with the universe I believe—the more you give, the more you receive.

I know this is true of relationships because Jesus didn’t keep His relationships safe. He didn’t coddle them and not risk at all. He pushed the disciples to always risk for their relationship to Jesus. And this proved that they weren’t just convenient. These relationships were tested through the fires of risk, and they came out stronger than before.

Avoid relationships that are convenient. Risk more and they’ll survive for the long haul.

Photography by Mikaela Hamilton

Filed Under: Community, Life Tagged With: relationship, risk

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  • marie giard

    As always, this is very wise and inspiring ! The advantage of calling your friends is also that you can schedule to meet them, and then, every time you feel alone, you can think about that day and rejoice in advance.

    • Neal Samudre

      Yes! Thanks for the comment, Marie! It’s funny how much impact a simple phone call can make.

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