Intolerant. Mean. Judgmental. Aggressive.
These are the stereotypes that sadly surround the word “Christian” in our culture. When people speak about Christians, some unfortunately picture them as hateful people who are opposed to them as human beings. They don’t see the love of Christ or anything redeeming at all. Instead, they see hatred.
This is a problem. We can’t look the other way and pretend the people who hold to these stereotypes are the ones who are wrong. They believe these things for a reason, and it is our responsibility to show them what living like Jesus really looks like.
We can’t blame Westboro Baptist or other fundamentalist cults for the negative stigmas plaguing Christianity in our culture. We must instead work to become the difference—the person who adequately displays the foundational love and grace behind Christianity.
But here’s the thing I’ve seen lately: typically, in trying to defend our faith, we prove the stigmas we’re trying to overcome. In standing up for Christianity, we come across as mean, judgmental, and aggressive.
This is only perpetuating the problem.
We can’t overcome these stifling stigmas if we prove them right every time we try to battle them.
We must instead look for a better way to defend our faith.
Here are a few practical suggestions to defending the faith, without doing injustice to the gentleness, love, and grace of Jesus:
1. Stop defending your aggressiveness with your own interpretation
Stop saying you are justified to be mean with non-Christians because Jesus dealt harshly with the Pharisees. Jesus knew what was in the heart of the Pharisees. He knew there was no chance for them to change. We do not have that knowledge of others. We cannot determine who has the capacity for change. This means we practice only what we know to be true of Jesus’ act on the cross—that He died so that everyone could be saved. We practice grace because it is foundational to His act on the cross. Stop skewing that grace to justify your shortcomings.
2. Resist the urge to jump into a battle
You shouldn’t fight back every punch thrown at Christianity. You can’t come to the rescue for God. He can handle Himself. Hold back the urge to defend God every time, and instead, hold the situation with an open hand—trusting that God will raise people to fight the battle. And trust that sometimes, that person isn’t you; it’ll be someone perfect for the job.
3. Act out of faith, not emotion
When someone slings an attack on faith, we oftentimes want to act like Peter, who chops off the ear of the attacker (Luke 22:50-51). But when we act out of our anger, sometimes we make the situation worse. We give God more work to do.
Instead, we should filter the situation through our faith, not our emotions. When we are angry, it doesn’t always mean we act with anger. We can be angry but choose the next action out of what would coincide with Scripture and the beliefs of our faith. Jump to something foundational instead of acting on high-end emotions.
4. Stop debating in public
It’s not appealing to have debates on blog comments and on Facebook. It gives off the impression that Christians are at war with one another. Instead, have a discussion—a talk where people are respectful and acknowledge others point of view before completely shutting them down. A public discussion is a much better look.
5. Be patient and slow with others
Jesus stuck with the disciples and practiced patience with them though their inability to understand was frustrating. He was gentle and slow with them because he knew this is what transformation looks like. It is not an instant act. It is something that takes a lot of care, nurture, and teaching to cultivate. Pray for patience so that you don’t mess up this process of change.
6. If you can’t word something in a positive way, don’t say it
It’s possible to oppose something, but to state your opposition in a positive way—a way in which the other person feels welcomed and respected enough to possibly change their view. We don’t need to attack each opinion or viewpoint we don’t agree with. Instead, practice not saying the words you can’t say positively. It is our goal to sharpen one another, not attack them.
Hopefully there’ll be a day where Christians are known for being the most loving people to engage in a debate with. Hopefully we can overcome the stigmas of hate and judgment. But this movement starts with us individually. Each person much rise to be the difference, to give priority to the expansion of God’s Kingdom through grace instead of hate.
The task is yours. Where will you stand?
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