A truth that is so easy to forget is we are subconsciously shaped by the messages of our culture. And if our culture is naturally about self-centered pursuits, then deep down we struggle with selflessness somewhere in our spirit.
Today, no one is entirely selfless. Only Jesus was perfectly selfless.
Yet, that doesn’t mean we can’t strive for a more selfless spirit. If we are to become like Jesus in everything we do, then selflessness is not an impossible ideal, no matter how self-centered our surrounding culture may be.
The good thing is, if we uncover the reasons we struggle with selflessness in our culture, we might be able to attack the problem at its roots.
Consider the following reasons you, or someone else, might be struggling with keeping a selfless spirit today:
1. Media
If we are what we consume, then we must always keep an eye on the sort of information we consume. Today, personal-development websites poison us with the idea that ultimate fulfillment comes from self-centered achievements. Many of these sites only champion living for the self, living life how you want it.
Draw a strict boundary on this information you consume. Make sure you realize that at the end of the day, life is more than just vain achievement. Ensure you have a resource telling you that.
2. Personality Tests
Our culture is obsessed with telling people who they are without having them do the work. In a world filled with noise, it can become hard for one to discover their voice, who they are and what they’re passionate about. Yet, instead of letting them figure this out on their own, we provide Buzzfeed articles and personality tests to tell them.
The problem with this is, we’ve made a game of discovering our voice. Now, we love the thrill of finding more about ourselves, without applying that knowledge for the benefit of others.
Truly, your knowledge of yourself should be used to serve others. Don’t string a bunch of personality tests on top of your voice if they’re never going to help you make a difference.
3. Busyness
In a fast-paced society, we live by our to-do lists. For me, it’s a struggle to break free from what I set out to do for a day, which is why I hardly make to-do lists. I never want my busyness to keep me focused on myself and closed off to other opportunities. I never want to be a slave to my to-do list. Instead, I want to slow down for a more selfless approach to life.
4. Stuff
The problem with things is they can distract us. In our culture of excess, it seems that the more we have, the more we define ourselves by what we have. This means, it can be difficult to break free of the hold our stuff has on us, to actually live a life centered on others. This is why I believe Jesus tells the disciples to carry little with them when they go from town to town announcing the Kingdom of God. It wasn’t only about easy travel; it was about better impact. It was about truly caring for people without stuff getting in the way.
It’s time we push against the excess trying to creep into our lives, and sanctify the space that allows us to care for others.
5. Image Management
Because of social media, we can oftentimes be too busy controlling how we appear to others rather than impacting others.
Though social media was created for connection, we can abuse it by making it about comparison—who looks better than who online.
Instead of spending our time manipulating our image, how about we take a step back and let our honest selves flood our profiles? How about we share who we really are instead of putting a filter on ourselves? Then, I believe, we’ll step away from impressing, and step into impacting.
6. Denial
A large hurdle I had to overcome to live more selflessly was the personal denial I had about being self-centered. In other words, I believed I was selfless for most of my life. Many of us can be like this. Many of us can have blinders on whether we’re truly selfless or not. Instead, we assume we’re selfless because that’s how we want to see ourselves.
But let me give you a dare: instead of assuming you’re selfless and coloring your perception of things to see yourself as selfless, really analyze if you are. Ask people what they think. Don’t settle for your assumption. Let the truth rattle you into change.
7. Misunderstanding of Jesus
Many of us can believe a prosperity gospel—that Jesus died so we could live the life we want. But that’s never been the case. If that was the case, Jesus would’ve told the disciples to go on vacation for the Great Commission. Instead, He sends them out to do work, just like He does with us.
Jesus didn’t die and rise again so we could live the life we want; He did it so we could live the life others need.
Never mistake the gospel as a vehicle for self-centered living. That’s a profound misunderstanding of Jesus.
If any of these reasons apply to you, take off your blinders and attack the problem. We cannot afford to perpetuate self-centered living. We need selflessness. The world depends on it.
If you liked this post, check out:
The Guide to Living Selflessly While in Debt
How Finding Your Calling Leads to Selflessness
7 Things We Unnecessarily Care Too Much About